Happy Super Bowl Sunday!
There is an unbelievable amount of snow in Toronto right now.
It’s the perfect day to order in, watch the game, and finish a book.
Tight ends all around!
Before you settle in, I’m here with a play-by-play of everything I read in January.
First, a note on ratings
You can’t have a game without a referee!
To know me is to know that I love a rubric. Here’s what each rating means to me:
1 star = we are enemies. A book so offensively awful that I’m willing to publicly pick a fight. Do you understand how much I hate confrontation? How much reverence I have for anyone who writes a book?! I cannot in good conscience rate something this low unless it really really really deserves it.
2 stars = this was bad! I’m annoyed enough to have built a case for why I didn’t like this book, but there may be 1-2 redeeming qualities that have kept it safe from my full wrath.
3 stars = you almost had me. A solid, middle-of-the-road rating. If Marie Kondo asked, a 3-star book would not spark joy, but I might consider keeping it anyway because you never know when you might need that particular book.
4 stars = I liked this a lot! Something is preventing this book from getting a perfect score, but I would still happily sing its praises.
5 stars = you are a god and I kneel at your altar. These are my top-shelf books. This rating is reserved for titles that have left me dumbfounded, inspired, inconsolable, or somehow changed because of how amazing they were.
Generally, I treat 3 stars as my baseline. Every book starts there and is rewarded or penalized as I see fit.
Half points. I do give half points because StoryGraph lets me. Simple as that! They also have the option to do .25 ratings, but that’s outrageous and frankly overwhelming to even consider.
Down, Set, Hut! Onto the books
The overall vibe of the January was ‘get me the fuck out of here.’
As such, my reading skewed toward fantasy. I swapped the darkness, dry skin, and the impending collapse of society for shadow daddies, dragon scales, and the impending collapse of fictional societies.
🐠 Playground, Richard Powers (3)
The twist in this book was, admittedly, very cool. That said, I had to consult Reddit to fully grasp the nuance, which is a red flag! I shouldn’t need to do more reading if you’ve had my attention for 300+ pages…but maybe I’m being harsh. If you’re interested in sea creatures or AI and don’t mind a slow pace, pick this one up.
♠️ One Dark Window, Rachel Gillig (3)
A romantasy about a girl with a monster stuck in her head, which sounds cool, but was less interesting than I imagined. I expected it to be grittier and more metaphor-heavy than it was — and that’s on me. The only thing wrong with this book was the poems at the top of every chapter gave away every single twist? What the heck was that!?!? Ultimately, I will not continue this series (even with the cliffhanger ending)
🐍The Serpent and The Wings of Night (4) and The Ashes and The Star-Cursed King (3.5), Carissa Broadbent
I love a duology, and these books had everything I wanted: vampires, a tournament to the death, major plot twists, a pinch of spice, and — of course — some major daddy issues. Just a damn good time!
Also, I have a soft spot for this line in Carissa Broadbent’s author bio: “I live with my fiance, one very well behaved rabbit, one very poorly behaved rabbit, and one perpetually skeptical cat in Rhode Island”
🥪 Sandwich, Catherine Newman (3.5)
A literary novel about a mother exploring grief while on a week-long family cottage trip with her adult children. Sandwich had funny prose, quippy dialogue, and quirky characters, but didn’t score higher because I thought the family drama needed more stakes. An enjoyable read nonetheless. PLUS! It had this quote that my longtime readers will enjoy (iykyk)
”The girls are on the bed, watching TikToks about somebody who filled his basement with water and turned it into an eel habitat. Or maybe I didn’t hear that right.” (pg 45)
🖼️ The Picture of Dorian Gray, Oscar Wilde (4.5)
A classic for a reason! It’s philosophical. It’s spooky. It’s even more relevant now in the era of Botox, Instagram Face, and The Substance. We are DUE for a retelling! There is an influencer story to be told, and I am screaming into the void for someone to tell it.
🐉 Onyx Storm, Rebecca Yarros (2)
Without giving any spoilers….This book was confusing. I’M SORRY! IT WAS BAD! If you disagree, come fight me on it like this diva👇
A few gripes with soft SPOILERS to read at your own risk:
The plot was 80% filler, but the important parts were so rushed that they didn’t make sense. Look me dead in the eye and tell me you knew exactly what happened in those last ten pages. I dare you.
The main character denied or avoided the core conflict for the entire book? Literally, your man is losing his soul piece by piece, but we’re fighting about sleeping next to each other??? K.
Side characters died and left and came back and I was completely unmoved. Why? Because none of them mattered or because the danger never felt real.
Some plot holes were explained away with some suspiciously convenient developments. (Oh, that’s the only breed of dragon that can talk to everyone without a bond??? How strange!)
Extreme fans are trying to trick me into believing this was a good book based on clues they’re digging up from the first two books.
I don’t care how many deep cuts you can find that maybe-possibly-could-potentially allude to something down the road that isn’t confirmed yet but might actually be super cool if it happens.
That’s not why I read books.
I don’t want everything to feel like a pop quiz on how closely I remember names and dragon colours and signets and the map at the front that I honestly cannot believe people actually reference because truly does it matter that much????
This is romantasy… It shouldn’t be that hard!
If I wanted to drive myself nuts looking for easter eggs, I’d become a Swiftie…
Will I read the rest of the series? Yes, absolutely!
I love anything that brings non-readers into the fold, and I simply cannot deny that Fourth Wing has become part of the cultural zeitgeist.
I really liked the first book, and I’m on my knees begging Rebecca to stick the landing in this series. I know you can do better than this!!!
I was rooting for you! We were all rooting for you! How dare you!
INTRODUCING THE MY SIDE PLOT HELP DESK
Listen. I read a lot.
If you’re looking for the right book (ie: an alt to Fourth Wing), want a specific review, or are trying to figure out the genre that suits you best - you’ve come to the right place! Shoot me a note. I’ll take whatever request you can think of!
Looking for a hyper-specific vibe?
Want to find something similar to a movie or song that you love?
Looking for a hybrid between your two fave books?
Hit me up, and I’ll find your perfect match👇
My TBR
In 2025, I am focused on one thing and one thing only: The newest Hunger Games prequel.
Sunrise on The Reaping by Suzanne Collins comes out on March 18th. Who is coming with me to this midnight release party????
Epilogue
What have you read so far this year?
Anything I should add to my TBR?
Do you have a reading goal?
Do you agree with my reviews!? Tell me I’m right! Tell me I’m wrong! Send me hate mail! Engage, god dammit!